floating

I close my eyes so I can go back there, tonight I had to. I feel the tip of my toes and fingers, they feel at peace. I feel at peace. I’m floating through space, pointlessly. It was the most beautiful feeling in the world. Gravity no longer weighs on me, doesn’t pull me back down anymore. I’m truly free.

I soak it all in, the massiveness and the unending nature of all that’s around me. Induces humility, knowing that there’s a whole world out there. It’s not just me. I let myself fall deeper into the emptiness, it might be the only empty that’s somehow at the same time the exact opposite of empty. It’s full, but of what?

It felt scary, but beautiful. There are stars all around me, but I can’t reach any of them. So close, yet so far. Never enough. Knowing that I have the stars within me is all the reminder I needed.

I open my eyes, no doubt tears rolling down, I knew what I was feeling was real, because there was no way I’d allow myself to compare the beauty of floating through the space with the emotion I’m feeling inside me, unless it was pure and genuine. I was floating, and I fell.